Quotes De Moi Jeff!!!: don't make *throb* me slap *throb* your bitch *throb* up!
Jeff!!!: lol
Jeff!!!: I just emitted a noise..
Jeff!!!: and I have no idea how
Angela's SN: hm..okay
Kristen: You mean he has velcro shoes?
Me: Yes, but he has very a very nice chest...
Refresh my bitch!
You know what we can do.... I don't remember.. it has something to do with getting the security guards dizzy.
I just imagined him (Colonel Sanders) walking out into the hallway with an army of chickens following him.
(while driving) Sir, you're worth 2000 points.. BOOM!
Squirrels drinking beer? yay!
Jeff!!!: Jess says hi.. in the midst of my over loading Lemaz breathing
(Sleepily looking at clock and turning to Tamar) What time is it?
Jeff!!!: I expect a mentioning in your unmentionables.. lol
Jeff!!!: no.. wait
********Melissa & I talking to some random guy on this internet game she has**********
******We're black, and the phrases we can use are limited and preset by the game*******
White has chat turned on. (Beginner, English)
You are playing as Black.
Black> Okay, I'm back
Black> I'm thinking...
Black> I'm thinking...
Black> Hello
Black> No
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> Thank you
Black> I got the corner!
Black> I got the corner!
Black> Ouch!
Black> Okay, I'm back
Black> Oops!
Black> Ouch!
Black> Didn't see that coming!
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If he got any cuter.. I'd have to stab MYSELF with a fork..
Jeff!!!: and I would LOVE finding money in my thong
Me: My mother and I have to talk to me... zipple?
Jeff!!!: this is problematic
Jeff!!!: I want Jessica Alba
Walker's SN: well...who doesnt?
Walker's SN: lol
Jeff!!!: GAY MEN
X Man: I want to be hitler.. no, I don't want to BE hitler, I just want to play with his army.
Me: I think I've said that before too!
I seriously think I just told you to put your arm around Barbara Bush...
Kermit does not have boobies!... KERMIT DOES NOT HAVE BOOBIES! stop feeling up kermit!
OMG I have a poster of his nipples! Nipples Nipples Nipples! I love his nipples.. *loving sigh*
Jeff!!!: You.. go to show.. date Fiddler on Roof- Watkinds Mill Chris show in, you me go spring yes? good
Jeff!!!: I'm rubbin my balls.. not gettin anything..
Either that girl is licking her nipples or this is just a bad porn.
To the Jews.. he was simply Jesus- just like Cher or Madonna, he just had one name.
John: So you don't believe Mary was a virgin then?
Jeff: Mary could have been a slut for all I care
It's between me and my mother.. .. and waddiyacallit... a genetical thing
"Puppies...Kittens...Gonna grow into Dogs and Cats." -My version of Celine Dion's "Rain, Tax"
OMG.. was that a midget on a steamroller? AHHH! Where is Kristen??!?! IT WAS IT WAS!?!?!!!!!
John's Quotes
J's SN: she's tha breast
Lets go put the duck in the fridge... put the duck in your mouth....quack quack.... quack......aflac!
someone needs a buttplug (while looking at Austin)
Lick the chicken!
Beer is for straight boys who want pussy...
And the extra wide mouth is good for .. big... thick... yeah... oh look it's a quote!
I'm a re-re!
Oooh, I like your chair with arms... they still allow me to sit doggy style... INDIAN STYLE INDIAN STYLE! Whew, Freudian slip huh? Can you TELL someone wants it doggy style?
How'd I get on a damn "sex pic of the day" for straight people?
I am getting so hot.. going to take the pants off!
If I wanted your ass in my mouth I'd ask for it!
I'm tellin you.. there's a black girl up in here!
Don't I work it likes it's platinum plated? I got a platinum plated ASS!
I guess I won't be buttering my meat than!
*With an English accent* Keep it real as I touch your penis.
Suck satan's cock for quarters.
Did someone urinate in his cheerios?
Ari C's Quotes A's SN: hey
Jeff!!!: hey!
A's SN: what's up yo?
Jeff!!!: lol not much homey (sexual)
J.L's Quotes 2 Men can't make babies... but they can certainly try! Viva's Quotes Viva: you are NOT a peacock!!
Me: ugh. I want some cock!
Me: So is today going to be religious or non religious?
Viva: Potatoes .. pancakes!
Viva: Wait, what as the question?
the 43 year old gay man in the back of her car: You should masturbate more often.
The 43 year old gay man who calls her Chloe: We should have sex some time.
so yeah..i was sexually harrased and then beat up by a 4 yr old.. how fucked up is that?
Random Quotes
There's a certain class of people who will do you in and then remain completely mystified by the depth of your pain. - Kinsey Milhone You're so stupid it makes me tired. - Nina Van Horn I wanted to raise the kids Jewish, and you wanted to sleep with men... ... And I really do enjoy that!! - Grace, Will
To your astonishment Chris seductively drank his ovaries on your nose. (Madlibs)
Willy tickles the twang for 2 oy oy- Simpsons
That's a foul. I am taking the ball and going home... the chase begins- Simpsons
Good gracious, I should bust a cap in your ass- Simpsons
Nothing pleases my shiny bottom more than a black bottle bubbly!
It's called Romance-- not everyone can make their ass glow red to attract a mate!
Are you really that dopey or do you just say stupid things to show off your outfits?
G-d, you're being good... I'm glad I knew you when you were bad!
Why don't you jump up her dressed like a Bavarian fruitcake?
Now where's my wonderbra? - Mel Gibson
I'm a lesbian!- Mel Gibson
Be proud! Welcome the gay line-backer into your shower!
(Drunken) I have decided I will love this child.. despite his mother's stupidity and his father's dumbitity...
Anger is my religion!
Sex is like a bridge game, if you don't have a good partner than you better have a good hand.
Oooh, yay, buffalo testicles.. *chomp*
Why the hell did I intend to catch that in my mouth but at the last minute decided not to and allow it to hit my head instead?
(2 Hicks)
Man: I'm gay a little bit.. (while wearing a dress)
Woman: When did you become gay? This morning?
Respect the bubble
Just because the ambulances go by at high speeds does not mean they want to race you.
"Maintaining a state of conscienceness is a minimum requirement"- Colonel Sanders
Bye bye coochie! - Charo
Who gives a flyin patoot about Aids infested GAy squirrels
No more little acorns up my ass when i sit down to watch oprah
If she married a GUY she'd be like.. the worst lesbian ever!
What? It's not like I'm putting little NIPPLES on them!
I'm sorry.. there's laughing in my head.
I'm sorry it's the pigs- they're reluctant to get in the blanket!
The world is my lesbian wedding.
Ok, Penish shmenish.. we're all people!
I can't tell you how many times after a bender I'd wake up next to strange priests
But her baby thought he was the Pope. He smiled and waved, and smiled and waved. With his penis in a bottle.
Am I on crack? - Mrs. Klotz
I'm like.. whoa! - Mrs. Bresnick
When I asked him to take it out, he said he didn't want to offend the Arabs.
Just focus on his ass, it doesn't matter what he says.
OMG we're trapped.. I'm trapped and I gotta pee! Help us! I have to pee! Please! Atlantic City, I have to pee!
Look at the little pony.. pont pony pony... Who's a pony? You're a pony, oh yes you are pretty pretty pony!
Shane got spooked and started bucking wildly underneath me.. I felt this surge of confusing emotions...
I am deeply in love with Gaby Dymond and I would therefore like to publicly announce my sincerest apologies to him for all of the sinful thoughts that I keep having about him. -Daniel Minerbi
Where do you get chickens in New Jersey? - Mike
Rudlof the red nosed wino
Had a very shiny nose,
And if you ever got close to him,
He would take off all his clothes,
All of the other wino's,
Used to laugh and call him names,
They never let poor Rudolf,
Play in any wino games,
Then one chilly christmas eve,
Rudolf froze to death.- Erich
I ain't a gentlemen, I just don't want to hump a crazy girl!
Try as I might my hyman's never been broken.. it just stretches like taffee.. brrrrrrrrrrrrrm boo.. brrrrrrrrrrrrrm boo
No thanks, I have a hat full of waffles... "mmmm waffley!" Yes, I have syrup in my pants!
strwbryfields84: ..i don't think that's narcolepsy..feeling a bit deranged, jeff?
(On having a baby) I wanted to name her fluffy.. Right up until the last minute I kept praying that she'd be a kitten.
You don't know! They could all be "the one" And you won't know until you sleep with them.. all of them!
Wild goat time - that means having a really good time with goats right? - Rabbi Sales
If I say cat..?
BACON!
Kitty?
BACON!
Kitty Kitty Kitty?
BACON BACON BACON!!!!
How can you let him talk to your crotch like that?!?!!
Because spam cannot be absorbed through the penis....
Chana's Quotes Jeff!!!: I see you baby shaking that ass.. shaking that ass shakin that ass
C's SN: oh yeah
C's SN: im shaking it
Sarah's Quotes More Jeffay! Sarah say's hi!
Put me up.. PUT ME UP! Mine's longer then Tama-ar's!
HEEHEHEHEEHEEHEHE
Sarah Say's hi!
Penis? Nifty Penis!
You would- in response to anything. My ass Chris's Quotes This is true- (It's MINE)
C's SN: i highly doubt my light would tell you to shoot your mother. it's a prefectly sane strobe light
C's SN: omg, i'm stupid.
Pontificate, what a cool word!
When the cows come home, when they fall over and die and rot...
Jeff!!!: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
Jeff!!!: HAHAHA
Jeff!!!: Ha
Jeff!!!: ha
Jeff!!!: ok
C's SN: are you sure you're done?
Jeff!!!: sex
Blue02Dude: i'll take that as a no
Jeff!!!: well pah
Jeff!!!: pah on your head PAH PAH I say
C's SN: you want a date?
C's SN: hehehe...."welcome to jeff's nipples...."
C's SN: hehe...i thought of you shrinking cars. first, them lying down on a couch telling you about their oil transmission problems....
Shauna's Quotes AfroPuffGirl16: I can do stuff with guys WITHOUT cleaning a bathroom
AfroPuffGirl16: I'm so fustrated I wanna kick myself in the ass
Jess: Ok, the stimulation has ended...
Shauna: Yeah, now that the batteries ran out! Lauren's Quotes Haha.. you said bitch!
I think my children have died.
Walker's Quotes W's SN: and watch out for that essense shit
W's SN: it'll kill ya!
W's SN: chickens are decent people! why doesn't anybody understand that!
W's SN: no HER dick. her dick (which equals carl lol)
W's SN: laaaaaaaaadedaaaaaaaaaaa
W's SN: im fucked im fucked im fucked im fuuuuuuuuucked.
Jeff!!!: we eat relish off of each other's Icons
W's SN: what...the...fuck...
Angela's Quotes A's SN: my cats learned how to use the answering machine and earse messages before I get them
A's SN: its now locked safely in a drawer
A's SN: hehe. I meant not BE a woman.. BE WITH a woman..
A's SN: but I could see you in drag..
I'm going to strangle you with ribbons. :)
Beth's Quotes
Me (with my Screen name): So how is the beth?
Beth: wow. with that name, it could only be porn or jeff
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