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Burn
The other side of the fence,
Sweet dew blasts of oblivion.
But where the grass is greener,
Can not knowing equate love?
Digging to get under,
Building steps of love to fly over,
But the deeper you dig,
The stronger the roots of the fence
And the further you build,
The taller the expanse of such unwilling boundaries
I love you, the only words you know
You say them to my face,
You say them in your sleep,
You dont know how to think
You dont know how to be.
Alive! Tell me! I beg
I cant beg anymore.
Is the distance too much?
No, only the indulgence of your soul.
You dont know how to let me in.
And I dont know how to give up.
I love you, I always will.
You love me, I know that for sure.
We cannot live this way,
For the fence is too tall,
And Im getting tired of digging.
2/3/02 Sail Away
From like to love,
From love to hate,
The crash of a velvet glove,
A bridge begins to break.
Rushing through life,
Ignoring ones needs,
The mind forever in stride,
While the heart goes to bleed.
Tears from great joy,
Tears from terrible despise,
The soul sits so coy,
Leading to emotional demise.
Stopping to learn,
Learning to wait,
Relieves the hearts burn,
And allows the mind to mate.
While love is a harsh game,
Those at peace prevail,
Where scratches and bruises can maim,
True love lets us sail.
Summer 2001 Hope
When all is destroyed, forever gone. There is always hope - however unjust. Righteousness prevails as the stong fall. When all permanents are erased, the unjust become holy, until all shall rise again. Hope. Mirror Image
A change of heart; a change of mind.
A life less beautiful; is so unkind.
When all bonds break; the dam unravels.
Flows forth truth; reality forever baffles.
Secure in love; without warning given.
All is lost; forever shattered. Beauty
The eye of the beholder,
plucked from the reality into the obscure,
as life, when alas it is over;
thy image shall be the cure.
With white, red, orange & yellow,
the sun can be so cruel.
Yet blue, black, the heart bellows,
as its art breaks all rules.
The masterpiece takes its affect;
with the accepted body in nudity.
Born is the baby in all its perfect;
But the question remains, what is beauty?
Love's Suicide
If I were to love you,
would you love me?
If I were to long for you,
would you miss me?
If I were to idolize you,
would you withdraw from me?
If I were to give in to you,
would you be satisfied with me?
If I were to sanctify you,
would you release me?
If I were to call on you,
would you threaten me?
If I were to miss you,
would you disappear from me?
If I were to love you,
would it kill me? Gone
They say the soul never dies. They say that even when the heart grows cold; rock solid, from lost love, deep hatred or death, and that heart stops, the soul lives on . I find this very hard to believe. My soul died tonight. It made sure to make me feel all the pain it has felt from long years of loneliness and despair. It made sure to make me remember all love that has disappeared like the tide receding into the ocean, only to resurface somewhere else. It never gets any easier though; finding love and then losing it. Only the rubble left on the beach, and the memories of such a beautiful thing are left for the taking. My soul died tonight. It made sure to make me understand that this is not all of a sudden. It was because I havent loved, or been loved in such a very long time. It made sure to make me cry, to make me feel some of its pain. My soul died tonight. It made sure to scream echoes in the vast emptiness that engulfs me. It made sure to make me regret all the times I should have said something, should have done something. Should have stood up for the one I secretly love, only to have them slip through my fingers into the open arms of someone else. My soul died tonight. me |  |
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Jack
Youre everywhere I look,
Yet youre not actually here.
Youve got me so hooked,
Id give anything to have you near.
Ive loved you true,
Since the moment we met.
Yet Im so blue,
For you forever I did not get.
For that short time,
My dreams were realized.
And on my dime,
You took to the skies.
In my everlasting night,
You flew to my heart.
But you were my light,
And your love created the spark.
The fire in me burns,
And no one can put it out,
My body and soul for you yearns,
As only my eyes pout.
Of all the men Ive loved,
None has ever made me feel,
That they were sent from above,
An angel from heaven for me to steal.
But here you are in my heart,
A feeling I will never lack.
When we meet again we shall not part,
Because in you I have found my love, Jack.
1/4/02 (Upon you flying back to OR) Dance
As I move forward, he retreats.
As I climb back, he follows.
A short caress, the small of the back,
The warmth of breath, nape of the neck.
Two steps forward, he looks away.
Forever three steps behind is where we reside.
Together as one, yet as estranged as the sea,
To spin, to twirl,
Flashing eyes, a triumph.
Absent of love, full of passion,
But each to his own we dance.
12/13/01 The Forest
Running from dreams in dreams, as the forest darkens in day, when the light of the present fails to illuminate the past. With failing eyes but strong will & heart, time flies by and memories dim. But the choice to remember never alleviates the pain, of love lost. Fly
As high as the freedom,
flashing wildly into the wind,
my own answer slumbers,
with tears falling on the grain.
Like a needle into my heart,
pain is not mine to be had,
for the numbing love that presides,
makes for unquestioning faith and devotion.
Blowing, wildly searching for the sky,
a shimmer and sparkle as I slowly divide.
Everywhere, anywhere, with open heart, body and soul.
I feel the floating, the blue of the free.
As others fall, I know I shallnt,
For Im true and confines cannot hold - my feelings for you.
As others fall, together we will,
Fly.
5/30/01
want someone want someone
just need a little warmth
lonliness is so cold
and I cant shiver
for too much longer
can anyone hear me?
I can imagine those eyes
I can hear that voice
there for me only me
can anyone hear me?
just need a little laughter
or at least someone
to cry with
please, please
the cold is killing me
- Laura
Chronology
Like your world turning round and round,
my feet as well cant touch the ground.
Searching for answers, the truth comes out,
but with a friend on the line, whats this all about?
My love, my life, my lost sense of lust,
uncontrolled as it may, as it should, as it must.
As youre confused, unable to breath,
all you can think of, is a way to leave.
But no! Not now, your mustnt escape,
for I, with my needs, your mind I will rape!
Your body, your soul, your very hearts right,
but not me, never me was I in your sight.
Look at me! See me, feel me, touch me!
For I, all my life have been searching for thee.
But no, with due course, you look far beyond,
as someone elses, you wish to form that bond.
All Im asking is for some of your time,
as my heart slowly suffers, with the close of this rhyme.
Tomorrow shall come, as it always does,
but will my hurt & persistence falter, from what it once was?
My affection for you has only escalated to the sky,
this I hope you understand as I bid your goodbye.
For while youre on a quest for self discovery,
the one for you is true, the one for you is me.
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